Sucking The Life Out of You – By Linda Bradt Finn
~ I am not sure about you all, but I have always tried to be a people pleaser and always help others… Sometimes, to the point that I am emotionally drained and dragged down. It wasn’t until 2015 that I finally realized there are folks who will always be an emotional drain on you and never listen to sound advice and never change their lives no matter how sick they are… I am talking physically, emotionally or mentally sick. Have you ever felt like that ? You do and do for others until your empty and you might not even have the energy for your own family that it has drained you so much… its not a good place to be. When you think family, I am talking those in your own house, not extended family outside your home. We have to focus on Us and our immediate family in our home as that is what matters at the moment. I know that is so true for me as a wife to a man with mental and physical disabilities and as a homeschooling mom of 3 who are still at home. There were days in my past where even my older kids as older teens and even as they become young adults or adults the drama and emotional damage that they can do to you , disabled me from doing my best for the Lord in my own home and it really reaps havoc on your family. Mark and I suffered a lot of emotional crap trying to raise my kids from a previous relationship. Even to the point of being investigated by CPS 4 times and found not guilty of the allegations put against us. And when it comes to “friends” those you have met, by letter, on the internet, or in person, I tended to go into each relationship 100% and thought others were the same way as I am. Time and time again, Mark would say “Lin, Human nature 101…smiling faces tell lies ” For so many years I never could see that as I was raised to be a real friend and a truthful person. So when I would help someone, send them things numerous times over a 14 year period and never see any fruit from the advise given or a changed lifestyle, you tend to wonder if what your doing is effective. When you strive to love people like the Lord wants you to and they act like you are treating them wrong, you get very discouraged at times. And if you know more folks who help the same people a lot and it seems like everyone’s love and mercy on them isn’t making them more responsible, but causing them to become dependent upon everyone, you have to re-examine what your doing…. When I started my business I had several friends doing the same business…. so I chose to sign up under someone that had friends in common with me, hoping none of your friends would feel hurt and yet I could do business along side them and if anyone wanted to know how I was succeeding , I would share my knowledge with everyone so we all learned and benefited. I love seeing others I know and love succeed ! So how much can you really help those who never change, you have watched and seen this is the reality right… With my older adult children, I don’t even like to use adult as they at times are so immature and self centered, they don’t have the qualities of adults who are mature… but with them, I learned that if I allow their drama in my home or near us, we all suffer harm emotionally and mentally. With others who are suppose to be Adults and never change as I was told at some point you burn that bridge, don’t look back and go on with your life and live without their drama and constant draining on your life…at least until they learn the lesson God is trying to teach them. Trials in life are for learning from and sometimes when we all step in the way of that, they never learn to stand on their own two feet and become dependents of whomever. ( its akin to the welfare in the US….constant handouts create an entitlement attitude at the expense of others who work hard to earn what they have.) We can only help just so much or we harm those we are trying to help by standing in Gods way to bring them to the understanding of the need to be God sufficient… God has known my heart for the last 15 years Mark and I have been married and regardless of what others think, its been in the right place and I truly meant to be a real friend.
Real Friendships and Relationships don’t suck the life out of you…
For a man to have friends, He must show himself/herself to be friendly…
Be Truthful, Be Honest, Be Responsible, Be Honorable, Don’t Whine
#LiveLifeOnPurpose #GodlyLiving #TrueFriendships #RealRelationships #BeTruthful #BeHonest #BeResonsible #BeHonorable #StoptheWhining #IhaveTried #BurningBridges